It’s A Process

Posted on

After a couple of days of even more incidents, we have finally made headway with our wild child – how else? – by first changing our own head. First on my own, then by talking with my husband, then by seeing other moms.

It just so happened that for the following two days I saw two other homeschooling moms at different events and they both shared their experience with me. They sympathized with this situation and told me what worked for them.

The most important take away is this: our children are showing us who they are. And that is a good thing. Before they go into the world, they show their true colors to us, their parents. We should be glad they trust us with their true selves. Don’t we want to know our children? Don’t we want to know they are independent and strong-minded and not push overs?

The second thing is this: I discovered something about myself in the process. If I can walk away from this encounter with a better understanding of what makes me tick (and not tick) then I count it all joy.

Which leads me to the third point: trials are really a source of joy because they cause us to grow. Yes, experiencing trials may be painful and intense and seemingly negative, but as long as we grow from it, it is all worth it.

Last but not least, our children are their own persons. We might want them to do something for our own fulfillment, but they may go in a different direction. The funny thing is, we might not even know why we behave a certain way. Our own secret desires may not be known to us until a conflict arises. What comes out of our mouth may surprise us and enlighten us.

For that, trials and conflicts in a homeschool are to be embraced and lived through and slowly but surely looked upon as blessings – count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations, as James eloquently put it in his epistle.


Discouragement

Posted on

Tonight I feel discouraged. We had an incident during violin practice with one of our children. This child refuses to slow down and do what is required. I worked and worked with their attitude. Nothing worked. Nothing I tried, that is.

Finally, I had to put a stop to the practice and send the child to their room. I felt so empty.

When I don’t succeed in motivating interest, it takes away my energy.

I feel discouraged.

What I know for sure is that when one is discouraged, one should not make any decisions.

I will not make any decisions. Not tonight.

Consequences will have to be applied – removal of privileges works well. No screen time for a week or something of that nature. No dessert – sugar is not good for us anyway…

It’s not the action. It’s the attitude behind the action that bothers me. It’s the defiance that needs to be addressed.

Parenting is not for the faint of heart.

Even if my children attended a private school or a public school, I would still be the one enforcing violin practice and piano practice, along with homework.

It was a tough day at the office. My husband reassures me this too shall pass. Education, like parenting, is a journey and some portions of this journey are tough.

Here’s to the power of prayer and steadfastness.