My Husband Does Not Want Me to Homeschool

To all mothers who feel called to homeschool but cannot, because their husbands do not approve:

I don’t know what is going on in your marriage. I have no idea how you two make decisions. But I know that God can intervene, based on what happened to me.

Here’s my story in short:

1. I did not want to homeschool.

2. God changed my heart.

3. I wanted to homeschool.

4. My husband did not.

5. I prayed.

6. God changed my husband’s heart.

7. We homeschool.

Want details? Read on.

Don’t want details? Skip to the last paragraph.

Once I decided homeschooling would be the best for the children, I tried talking to my husband about it, to no avail. We covered many angles. We turned the homeschooling lifestyle inside out. Finally, he decided we would not homeschool.

It wasn’t about the money. It was about:

  • the unknown
  • the weirdness factor
  • the fear our children would resent us
  • the conviction our children would turn out as social misfits
  • [insert the usual arguments against homeschooling from people who don’t have much information about it]

I got really, really sad. I felt I lost a dream.

As I counseled with a homeschooling mom, she said, “Adriana, the decision to homeschool happens in a split second. All the odds may be against it in your family. Then, something happens. God makes it possible. God changes hearts, you know?”

She was right.

Dad reading to his son and daughter

My husband reads to our children every day. This routine has already created numerous memories.

Just as I resigned myself to visions of PTA meetings and 5K race fundraisers at my children’s future school – because my children were only one and four at the time – my husband said, “OK, let’s homeschool…”

What changed his mind? He said he had this thought: “If homeschooling the kids means so much to my wife, why not let her do it? What harm can it do? If the kids get behind, they can catch up once we put them in school. If she gets overwhelmed with it, it will be her decision to quit. I won’t be the bad guy.”

The Holy Spirit was reasoning with him. I could not win the argument. God could, and He did. My husband listened. Now that’s the key.

God knows your husband. Pray and wait patiently on the Lord. If your husband’s heart does not change about homeschooling, God knows about it. He understands. God knows your heart and He will note your disappointment. Hang in there!


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